Tuesday, March 31, 2009

GETTING THE DUI THAT YOU DESERVE

Ohio man arrested for drunk driving on a homemade vehicle (a barstool!)

According to the Smokinggun:

MARCH 31--In a law enforcement first, Ohio cops this month arrested a man for drunk driving on a motorized bar stool. That's right, a motorized bar stool, which can be seen below in a police evidence photo. According to cops, Kile Wygle, 28, crashed his bar stool near his Newark home earlier this month and called 911 due to his injuries. When an officer arrived and asked Wygle what happened, he answered, "I wrecked my bar stool." According to a Newark Police Division report, Wygle's homemade ride is powered by a Briggs & Stratton lawnmower engine. Wygle noted that the bar stool could hit nearly 40 miles per hour, but that he was only going 20 when he wiped out late in the afternoon on March 4 (a witness told police that he spotted someone driving a "strange motorized machine" before the crash). A plastered Wygle, who failed a series of field sobriety tests, was charged with DUI and driving with a suspended license, both misdemeanors. His bar stool was not impounded.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

I Stand Corrected.

You Can't Spend It If You're Dead, But You Can On The Run!

MEXICO CITY, Mexico (CNN) -- The Mexican army has arrested a top drug cartel chief and four of his bodyguards, the government announced Wednesday.

Suspected drug kingpin Hector Huerta Rios faces members of the press Wednesday in Mexico City.

Suspected drug kingpin Hector Huerta Rios faces members of the press Wednesday in Mexico City.

Hector Huerta Rios, also known as "La Burra" or "El Junior," was arrested Tuesday in the city of San Pedro Garza Garcia in Nuevo Leon state, along Mexico's border with the United States. The state-run Notimex news agency reported the announcement, citing a news conference held by the secretary of national defense and the attorney general's office.

Huerta was flown to Mexico City on Tuesday night to face federal charges.

Federal officials showed the four suspects to the media in a news conference Wednesday. Video footage on CNN affiliate Televisa shows Huerta flanked on each side by two other suspects. He is looking straight ahead, a solemn countenance on his mustachioed face. Hooded soldiers are stationed to the sides and behind the suspects.

Huerta is a suspect in the September 2006 shooting death of Marcelo Garza y Garza, the head of the State Agency of Investigations, news reports said.

News of Huerta's capture made the front pages of El Porvenir, La Prensa and El Milenio newspapers.

Huerta's arrest came one day after Mexican authorities announced rewards of up to $2 million for information leading to the capture of top cartel operatives.

Monday, March 23, 2009

You Can't Spend It If You're Dead. . .

Mexican Authorities offer $2 million for the heads of drug lords.

Mexico's government on Monday offered $2 million each for information leading to the arrest of 24 top drug lords in a public challenge to the cartels' violent grip on the country.

The list indicated that drug gangs have splintered into six main cartels under pressure from the U.S. and Mexican governments. The two most powerful gangs—the Sinaloa and Gulf cartels—each suffered fractures that have given rise to new cartels, according to the list published by the Attorney General's Office.

The list offers 30 million pesos ($2 million) in rewards for 24 top members of the cartels and 15 million pesos ($1 million) for 13 of their lieutenants. Arrest warrants have been issued for all 37 people on the list, the Attorney General's Office said.

The Mexican government, long ineffective against the drug lords that run the country, did not indicate how they would protect any informers. Considering that the drug cartels have more money than the government and an effective track record for the old ultra-violence, I won't bet anything will come of this bounty.

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Howard K. Stern Gets Great Lawyer.

Unfortunately, I will have to stem my commentary and personal attacks on Howard K. Stern (see prior post). He is represented by my good friend and terrific trial attorney, Christopher Smith. For the unacquainted, Chris is a powerful defense attorney, understated and well-studied; he is perfect for this defense. While you may not know him now, you will.

So now I have to wish him, and, by proxy, Howard K. Stern good luck in trial. What a strange turn.

Friday, March 13, 2009

Howard K. Stern, Still a Lawyer.

California Attorney Howard K. Stern Charged by Felony Compliant

Howard K Stern, public embarrassment and professional hanger-on, remains a member of the State Bar of California despite years of bad behavior. For years Mr. Stern has been gracing the tabloids with his graceless presence, and now he will grace the defendant's chair in an upcoming preliminary hearing. Not that I take joy in accusation. OK, well, I do. But that is not the point. Reputation and conduct matter.

Mr. Stern, your real 15 minutes of fame are just beginning.

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

The Baddest Man in America

Uh, yea, Officer, he was a black male, long hair, six foot, always wears sunglasses. . .

You know you are Badass when you get to keep your shades on for a mug shot. How'd that go, exactly?

Deputy: Sir, please remove your sunglasses so we can take your mugshot.
Badass: Aw, hell no.
Deputy: You're the boss. (Click)

Of course, this is made all the more classic by the fact that he appears to be in a jail jumpsuit.

Monday, March 2, 2009

American Exceptionalism, Imprisoned

The locomotive to the penitentiary continues. . .

One in every 31 U.S. adults is in the corrections system, which includes jail, prison, probation and supervision, more than double the rate of a quarter century ago, according to a report released on Monday by the Pew Center on the States.

The study, which said the current rate compares to one in 77 in 1982, concluded that with declining resources, more emphasis should be put on community supervision, not jail or prison.

The greatest country in the world has the highest per capita incarceration rate of any civilized country. This shameful track record is unnecessary and a direct result of weak and pandering politicians who, interested more in votes than justice, repeatedly pass laws that incarcerate petty criminals and drug addicts. Massive reform is needed.